Con-Speak / What They Say Isn't What You Get

Bellingham Herald Op-page Editor Scott Ayers followed up his Monday blog entry about Bellingham's shortage of Conservative candidates with a post that attempts to define conservative. Unfortunately, Scott seems to draw on conservative sources for his definition of conservative.

Scott writes; "current conservative thought in our nation seems to be led by these tenets:"
( trouble is the 'tenets' are in conservative speak, so I'll help out by translating into Plain English )

(con-speak) -- Taxes are citizens' money and the government should take as little as possible. Current tax rates are too burdensome and should be cut, especially if it leads to a reduction in the size of government.

(Plain English) - Talk of lower taxes is an excuse to dismantle the protective functions of government and stack the deck against ordinary citizens.

(con-speak) -- Business growth and economic expansion are important to the future. A "rising tide lifts all boats."

(Plain English) - A smoke screen to cover up cronyism; the use of government to protect certain favored business interests from any real competition.

(con-speak) -- "Market-based" solutions are the answer to problems such as spiraling health care costs and potential Social Security insolvency. This is true locally with growth and environmental issues.

(Plain English) - "Market-based solutions" is code for sabotaging democracy so that a select few can loot the nations treasury. The Financial Services Industry can't wait to dip into all those FICA withholdings.

(con-speak) -- Win the "war on terror," including allowing law enforcement to use broad means defined in documents such as the USA Patriot Act as a way to sniff out those who might do harm to our country and citizens.

(Plain English) - Put out a continuous drum-beat of Fear mongering to scare people into surrendering their unalienable rights. The Patriot Act is the thin edge of the totalitarian wedge.

(con-speak) -- Foreign policy should focus on "exporting democracy" and economic freedom around the globe using free trade agreements.

(Plain English) - Use U.S. military might to install puppet governments and expropriate the resources of less developed nations by forcing them to agree to allow foreign control under the euphemism of 'free trade'.

(con-speak) -- Be skeptical about global warming science.

(Plain English) - Ignore science and protect the interests of the petroleum and coal industries at any cost.

(con-speak) -- Churches and social organizations are better than government at dealing with social problems such as homelessness and poverty.

(Plain English) - Buy the loyalty of Evangelical demagogues with government grants.

(con-speak) -- "Defense of marriage" and a belief that "the unborn child has a fundamental individual right to life which cannot be infringed."

(Plain English) - Keep the yokels distracted with fairy tales about the end of civilization.

> Scott Ayers isn't trying to sell conservatism, just discuss it... but, his (BELLINGHAM HERALD) blog does attract some of the local conservative 'true believers'.

One conservative commenter wrote: "BTW Bush is not a true conservative, never was one never will be." That seems like a strange reversal of opinion because I clearly remember before the results of Bush's policies came home to roost, that many conservatives said George W. Bush was a TRUE conservative, chosen by God to be President. (leaves ya wonderin' how God got it so wrong, don't it. [/snark])

Another conservative commenter wrote: "...Republicans have us pointed at capitalism and the morals system that made our nation great." But gosh, I can't find anything great (or even palatable) about the Republican version of a moral system or the crony capitalism represented by pillars of Republicanism like Former Republican Congressman Duke Cunningham, Former Republican Congressman Mark Foley and Republican uber-lobbyist Jack Abramoff.